I’m currently experiencing a severe plunge into a full-fledged shame spiral.
I hate mid-Janaury with a passion.
By now, every goal has been broken.
Every fantasy of how the new year will go has been squashed.
And I, somehow turn into a horrible person. Or so says my inner voice.
Here’s how my current shame spiral started:
I missed the gym last Friday. And then I missed the gym again on Sunday.
Despite promises that I wasn’t going to miss more than one day a week between Jan. 1 and the wedding.
When I should be saving every penny for that wedding, I went out and bought a new pair of running shoes. Shoes were supposed to be my birthday gift from my parents, but due to car troubles in September, the purchasing of the shoes was put off until a more reasonable time. This is not that time, yet somehow, shoes were bought.
And instead of buying a week’s worth of groceries on Sundays as planned, I put it off this week and we ordered a pizza for dinner. A big, greasy deep dish pizza.
And my lofty cooking goals have gone nowhere this year and apparently I have no immediate plans to rectify this. Last week, I served leftovers to Roomie for Fire & Wine. Leftovers. And this week, I’m totally cheating the rules again and making a risotto. That’s not a new cooking challenge. I make one almost weekly. How many times can I blog about risotto?
I then realized my longest blog post this year has been about The Bachelor. Really? The Bachelor? Oof. (Don’t you worry – I’m not quitting the weekly Cheese Whiz Highlights, just pointing out that this foolish show has been the subject of my longest blog post in 2010.)
While I haven’t been blogging, I have no idea what I’ve been doing with my time because my poor fiance has been walking around in a pair of jeans a size too small because his best jeans are in a pile of laundry.
Yes, he can do his own, but I’m a bit of a control freak about laundry and to counteract that, I offered to be the laundry maid in our home.
Only instead of walking around in a sexy little black number, I’ve been walking around in stinky workout clothes most nights.
When I have been working out, I’ve been doing more cardio. And cardio makes me hungry. Very hungry. And instead of reaching for healthy choices such as carrots, I look for cheese.
Specifically Cheese Whiz. And last night, I couldn’t find it. Which means one of three unpleasant scenarios are true: 1. I have eaten all of the Cheese Whiz and am so ashamed of my actions that I have blocked said event from my memory. 2. Fiance has staged an intervention of my Cheese Whiz addiction 3. My pantry is such a mess that I can’t see it sitting right in front of my face.
Make it stop.
Spiral slides give me total hair static.